fall is one of the best times of year. or at least i think so. the air turns crisp, so you can put on a hat or sweatshirt, but the sun still radiates warm through the atmosphere. leaves start to turn brilliant hues and fall so you can wade through them crunching and smelling their spicy musk.
now that it's not so blazing hot (and incidentally all plants are on sale) i've been getting out in the dirt again, transplanting, dreaming, weeding, dreaming some more, continuing the evolution of my gardens. i can't explain how much i love this. there's something so alive, so grounding about getting down on your knees & getting dirty, interacting with something beautiful and alive, getting dirty and tired from working hard, breathing the fresh air...i planted a rasberry bush to enjoy tasty berries, transplanted my russian sage & lamb's ear from my old house (and redid their front garden with some more non-gardner friendly plants :), bought a mt everest allium bulb with visions of it's globed splendor, and have a wisteria & red trumpet vine just waiting to be tucked into the dirt to grow.
as i pushed the earth around the sage & lamb's ear in the dark yesterday evening (i didn't realize how early the sun is setting these days!), tears fell as i learn to let go. to let go of control in relationships and of the paralyzing fear that comes with this. behind it all, i think it's about trust. learning to trust the good in others. learning to trust i am loved and valued.
maybe it's not just the gardening yesterday that was grounding and healing...
1 comment:
Hope you're ok. Your postings are moving and incredibly open.
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