cribs and extreme makeover: home edition

i had an incredibly relaxing weekend. time hanging out with friends, watching tv, going to the Step Into Africa exhibit, sleeping in, going to a friend's wedding...sunday night, matt & i were flipping channels and happened across "cribs" on mtv. sometimes i like watching this show--it's fun to see other people's homes, how they live, and dream of living in such luxury :)--so we started watching it. i was quickly disenchanted as the particular people on this episode were rather self-consumed and cocky. they didn't seem to really care about anything that really mattered.

we started flipping channels again and found out that "extreme makeover: home edition" was on as well. secretly, we both LOVE this show and cry every time we watch it (oops, did i say that?), so we decided to watch it.

as we watched the story unfold of a single mom who has given so much of herself and her love to children dealing with HIV, and we watched her & her kids be lavished with everything they couldn't provide for themselves, i was struck by the contrast between the two shows.

one is about me. one it about others.
one is about excess. one is about blessing someone else.
one is about living for pleasure. one is about sacrifices made for someone you care about.
one is about working your way up in the world. one is about grace.

what a beautiful contrast.

maybe extreme makeover: home edition is a little bit of the kingdom come to earth.

back in the garden...and letting go...

fall is one of the best times of year. or at least i think so. the air turns crisp, so you can put on a hat or sweatshirt, but the sun still radiates warm through the atmosphere. leaves start to turn brilliant hues and fall so you can wade through them crunching and smelling their spicy musk.

now that it's not so blazing hot (and incidentally all plants are on sale) i've been getting out in the dirt again, transplanting, dreaming, weeding, dreaming some more, continuing the evolution of my gardens. i can't explain how much i love this. there's something so alive, so grounding about getting down on your knees & getting dirty, interacting with something beautiful and alive, getting dirty and tired from working hard, breathing the fresh air...i planted a rasberry bush to enjoy tasty berries, transplanted my russian sage & lamb's ear from my old house (and redid their front garden with some more non-gardner friendly plants :), bought a mt everest allium bulb with visions of it's globed splendor, and have a wisteria & red trumpet vine just waiting to be tucked into the dirt to grow.

as i pushed the earth around the sage & lamb's ear in the dark yesterday evening (i didn't realize how early the sun is setting these days!), tears fell as i learn to let go. to let go of control in relationships and of the paralyzing fear that comes with this. behind it all, i think it's about trust. learning to trust the good in others. learning to trust i am loved and valued.

maybe it's not just the gardening yesterday that was grounding and healing...

the encouragement of a friend

last night a friend came over and hung out for a while. i realized what a sweet thing it is to have people in your life who are willing to talk about real issues with. don't get me wrong, it's great to have fun w/ friends, to watch tv together, to talk about nothing, to laugh. but i realized that i had been missing the kinds of friends who also are willing to speak to the harder issues of life.

and through our musings and sharings about seeking god, i found that just the right combination of challenge and encouragement can be a beautiful thing.